Dear grief: Fuck You

I took last Friday off. I figured I could cry myself to sleep on Thursday and I wouldn’t care how swollen my eyes were on Friday. Thursday night came and I felt no need to cry. Today on my lunch break I started crying out of nowhere in my car and had to stop myself because I didn’t want to look like I had been crying. I’m so sick of this. 

The overwhelming feeling of my moms presence has left me. When I think about her which is often, I feel her. Right now especially I feel her very strongly. I had a canvas of my mom made for me and my grandma. She got hers today and was so happy. It’s terrible. This whole thing is awful. 
Ugh.

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